Death By Burger!

What a great 4th of July!  We were lucky enough to head up to New Hampshire this past holiday weekend and do some camping with our neighbors and close friends, Jen and Ed and their kids.  We also met my old buddy Billy, and my "Uncle Joe" up there and had a fantastic time hanging with all of them.  I don't want to say too much about the trip itself, because that will be another blog post. Gotta reserve my stories!  What I do want to talk about now is last night's dinner.  

Road Trip!

Now over the years I believe that anyone who comes to this blog on a regular basis wants to read about the Jackass named Eric Costantino, AKA Wacky Dad.  When I first started my blog it was easy to come up with a Jackass story every day, but as the years go by, it isn't easy to pull a "wacky" stunt every few days for a blog post.  Sometimes I have to write about the mundane.  I appreciate you all sticking through the lean times, but I have a true Costantino moment to write home about this time.

As many of my readers, family, and friends know I am a big eater.  I derive serious happiness from a great dinner and a glass of wine or a beer.  Last night we decided to head out to the Woodstock Inn in Woodstock, NH for dinner.  With kids and all, we had a party of 19 people.  Just a little background on the Woodstock Inn.  We've been going there for an awful long time at this point, and we love the site brewed Ales and Lagers that they showcase.  I went there with the intention of getting a light dinner and 2 or 3 beers.    I almost made it!  I sat down and initially picked out a Chicken Cobb salad and ordered a nice hoppy IPA.  All was well until the waitress lingered for a couple of milliseconds too long.  I re-opened the menu.  That is when I saw this.

Yup, The Double Death By Burger!

I don't know how I missed it the first time, but it definitely had my attention riveted now.  I yelled over to my buddy Ed who was at another table.  "Did you see the Death By Burger?"  He nodded yes.  Long story short we both ended up ordering the thing.  I often underestimate things.  This was one of those times.  I kind of poo-pooed the whole thing.  How bad can it be?  It might be 36 oz of beef, but that's before they cook it.  All manner of bullshit to convince myself that this thing was gonna be a cake walk.  Hell I thought I'd down the thing, score my t-shirt, and walk away with a full tummy and a smiley face.  I just never considered the consequences of what I was doing.  I should know better, Ed had taken me to a place called Luxe Burger for my birthday this past January.  Ed, Myself, and my old buddy Billy plowed through Luxe Burger's challenge, and we all finished it. Admittedly it was very tough, but we all brought home the t-shirt and were able to conquer.

Luxe Burger!

Maybe I was cocky.  I don't know.  I decided to take a walk down to Woodstock's wall of shame where they post the photos of all the other idiots who take on the challenge.  It took my breath away.  The first thing I noticed was the sheer size of the burger.  It was truly MONUMENTAL!  Then I noticed how many folks were on the wall of shame as opposed to the wall of fame.  It wasn't pretty.  There were at least 3 failures to one success.  Oh shit I thought.  What did I get myself into?  I waited with bated breath.  Here is what I got myself into!

That is a full sized plate.  Look at my wife's expression in the background!

It was gigantic.  The bread was extremely heavy, and the burgers were very dense.  This was serious stuff.  I was scared to be honest with you.  I was with 18 of the people that I love most, and I considered the fact that I might fail.  I really didn't think I was going to make it, and I was going to fail in front of all of these people I love.  I know this sounds stupid to all of you.  I hate to lose and I love a challenge.  It doesn't matter what the challenge is.  If I'm in it, I'm in it to win, or to conquer.  In my little mind this burger challenge was no different.  I was going to be pissed if I couldn't get through it.  I started.  I plowed through as fast as I could taking small sips of my drink as I went.  I got through half.  Ed was eating his at the same time.  He was moving along well too, but I could tell he was hurting.  I was too.  I just continued to eat, even after it hurt.  The burger was charred a little, and it started to really make me feel kind of sick after a while.  I kept going.  I had doubts at about 2/3rd's of the way through, but I just said F*&% it and kept going.  Ed threw in the towel, but he didn't have as much at stake here.  I had all of these friends and family watching me.  My daughters were standing over my shoulder cheering me on.  Next thing I knew the WHOLE restaurant was cheering me on!  It really would have been a fun moment if I hadn't felt like yacking on my plate!  I actually finished the damned thing.  I didn't yack it up, and I actually went for a swim after we finished, and didn't sink, or get a cramp!

The T-Shirt Back

What's the moral of the story?  Well there really isn't one.  I'm still an idiot, capable of sincerely idiotic acts.  I'm still "Wacky Dad".  I've still got it!  That's it.  I have reaffirmed my status as one of the premier morons in the dad blogger world, and I'm damned proud of it.  To all of my fellow dad bloggers out there I'd like to throw down the gauntlet.  Head up to the Woodstock Inn and take the challenge.  If you win, you might be able to enter the Wacky Club!

Bon Appetit!


Wacky Dad

Summer Vacation With Goldfish Puffs!

With the kids home for summer vacation it seems like they eat about twice as much as normal.  Maybe it's all of the pool parties, and summer activities, but I swear that these kids are like little piranha's! 

Mia, Half Child, Half Piranha!

On a recent shopping trip we ran across a new product, Goldfish Puffs at Target. They sounded interesting so we grabbed a couple of bags, as well as a couple of the traditional Goldfish that my kids love.  For all of you that need gluten free snacks, it is good to know that these are a great go-to snack for your kids.  I happened to have all of my daughters with me when we were at the store, so we ended up getting two bags of the Goldfish Puffs and two bags of the regular Goldfish Snacks.  I never get out of the store easy when shopping with all of the girls!

We grabbed 2 flavors, Mega Cheese and Cheddar Bacon

We didn't waste any time digging into our new snacks.  It was lunchtime when we got home.  We decided to do a little taste test, comparing the old to the new.  The puffs were definitely a welcome change for my two older girls Abby and Ailey, Mia on the other hand is smitten with the pizza flavored traditional Goldfish Snacks.

A minding numbing array of Goldfish Snacks!

We ate our Goldfish out of hand, but also implanted them in our turkey wraps.  Definitely happy bellies all around, including Dad!

That's something you don't see every day!

After lunch we headed over to the neighbors pool for a fun afternoon of swimming and relaxing.  I'm not sure if all of those Goldfish we took with us swam into the pool filter, but most of them disappeared by the end of the day!  There were even some adult hands in the snack bag.

I'm glad we found this new snack before the summer!  Click Here for more info on this new Goldfish product!

Happy Summer and Happy Snacking,


Wacky Dad

Gone too Soon!

I was sad to hear the other day that James Gandolfini aka Tony Soprano passed away of a heart attack while traveling with his son. He was only fifty-one. Too young for-sure and sadly, he leaves behind a wife, son and very young daughter. A sad lose indeed.

All the tributes and conversations I was hearing about his acting talent and his off-screen, general good guy-ness got me thinking (yup, I do that sometimes). I knew I had watched quite a few of the Sopranos shows over the years but never the whole series from beginning to end. It was such a great show and I started to wonder what I might have missed in the episodes I hadn't seen. The other night I started watching the show again but this time from the very beginning. I plan to watch them each night until I get through them all.

Red wine in a little wine glass...
always on the table of a traditional Italian home

So I lie in bed each night with my earplugs in and my kindle fire on my chest, cracking up at all the crazy characters (who, by the way remind me of half the people I grew up around when with my Italian grandparents and their friends). The actors are awesome and the story lines are totally captivating. I love every minute of them.

My poor wife though, lying next to me in bed, can't be too thrilled about this new nightly routine of mine. I regularly wake her up when cackling away at whatever lunacy is happening on my little screen. And when I laugh, I howl like a bear and shake the whole freakin' bed in my fit of hysterics. She is definitely not enjoying this walk-down-memory-lane as much as me but sorry hon, Tony must live on!

On a side note, I found an article recently examining how the business people of the world could learn a thing or two about management skills from the ultimate Boss himself (Of course Tony's managing skills included using death threats to get things done but the article has some funny points). Check out the link below -http://management.fortune.cnn.com/2013/06/27/tony-soprano-james-gandolfini/

Tony's weekly "Board Meeting"

Here's to you James.   RIP

From this Wacky Italian Dad to you!

ANYONE ELSE OUT THERE DOING A SOPRANO MARATHON IN HONOR OF TONY TOO?

My Dancing Daughters!

This post is really a week overdue, but I wanted to get some photos up of my daughters at their most recent dance recital.  I can't believe how talented my daughter Abby has become on stage.

Here's Abby at the center of the photo.

It seems like yesterday she was three years old on the stage.  She is now in her 10th season as a dancer!  Unbelievable how time flies!  And my little Mia is just so damned cute up there.  I luckily got one of the best photos of my life as she finished one of her dances.

Mia at the end of her performance - They were dressed up as clouds. I think she pulled it off!

To my daughters I'd like to say well done!  Enjoy your summer off and get ready to put those dancing shoes on again for next year!  Congrats on a job well done!

Aristokat!

Well Deserved Bouquets!

Love,

Wacky Dad

The Taming Of The Beard

“I participated in a campaign on behalf of Dad Central Consulting for AVEENO. I received product samples and a promotional item as a thank you for participating.”

As many of you know, I am one hairy dude.  I was recently asked to try a trio of Aveeno shaving products, and I figured why not.  Anything that might help to get through this mess is worth a shot.  Also the women in my family have used Aveeno products for years and have always been happy with them, so I had a sense that the products would be good.

Ok, so I'm fat, I had a few drinks, and I'm ugly.
BUT, this IS proof that I have one heck of a thick
beard.  This thing grew in in 2 weeks.

Here's what I tried out.  The Face Wash, Shave Gel, and After Shave Lotion.

Even though I might be able to get away with it, as a former Marine, I never go to work without a shave in the morning.  It just doesn't feel right.  I always take a shower to soften up the mess, and jump right out of the shower with a wet face and jump right into shaving with my usual shaving cream and favorite razor.  I've been using the same products for my whole life, like father like son I guess when it comes to shaving habits.  Since I've started using the Aveeno products I have been following the same routine, except I have been using the Face Wash before I jump out of the shower.  This stuff is pretty cool.  It has an Active Naturals Oat Formula that acts to deep clean and strip away some of the dead skin on your face.  But the thing that I like most about the Face Wash, is it leaves a slippery layer on my face.  This really helps create a smooth shave when I actually apply the Shave Gel (which also has Active Naturals Oat Formula - just not the exfoliating component) and take a razor to my beard.  It definitely seems to make shaving a little less harsh, and by the end of the week my face is not in quite as tough of shape as it can be after a week of regular shaving.  Don't get me wrong, my beard is still tough, and I don't think anything short of my facial hair falling off is going to change that, but I am definitely happy with the results I'm getting from this product.  Here are a couple of before and after mugshots.  I know these photos will bring a lot of ridicule.  My huge nose, and ugly mug don't lend themselves well to photos at 6:00 in the morning, or 6:00 at night either, but here goes anyway!  

             

That's really hard to look at, but you can see, I actually did get a pretty good shave out of it.  I did try the aftershave lotion once, and I can see if you have dry skin that it would work great.  I have anything but dry skin. To the contrary, I think my Italian face emits its own natural olive oil moisturizer, and I have never used any kind of aftershave throughout my life. All in all I really like these products, and the pricing is pretty much in line with other products out there. I would categorize this as "definitely worth a try"!

Happy Shaving!

Wacky Dad