Dad Vs. Son

This is strictly a page where my father and I can come and bash each other!  Of course everyone can join in! 

December 12, 2010

OK, your wife steals a bra and you're a rocket scientist because you figure out how to disarm the exploding dye capsule.  I hope the hell they don't start putting those things in mens underwear.  

Man, you sure know how to make a father proud.  What are you doing training for bank robberies?  Maybe you should just start paying for your clothing, there's a novel idea.

Here's a picture of Eric with a couple of his Meathead Marine buddies in one of his finer moments.  We can all sleep well tonight knowing that the likes of these guys are on watch huh?  He even got dressed up to make an ass out of himself.

December 12th, 2010

My old man really is a genius!  Classic Leo stuff here.  This conversation stemmed from the fact that I successfully removed a dye filled anti theft device that was attached to a bra that Cathy bought in New Hampshire.  My wife is not a clepto just for the record.  she did pay for the bra! 

Dad really is a prize!

December 10, 2010

Eric Here.  Ok me taking a leak is somewhat normal.  I only look a little silly because your talented with Photoshop!  On the other hand I have to wonder why you have you hands up Don's shorts!

LOOK AT THE JOY ON HIS FACE!

Is there something you want to tell us all?  And Don is a nice and all but you could have picked a better looking guy!  Dad I am really worried about you!  Good luck with this guy Mom...By the way Dad you bought me all of the booze when I was 13......


Love,  


Eric


OK, I'm Back,

Contrary to what you might believe I have a life outside of sitting here telling the world what a meathead you are.

As for the Beauville, well, that one is a lot nicer than mine.  Heck, (note the PC language I use) Heck, mine had a yellow door removed from a school bus if you remember correctly.  As for your driving all the drunks home from the regatta at age 12, well, yeah, that's true enough.  But you couldn't have done that after that age because by the time you were 13 you were as drunk as the rest of the crew.  Here's a pic of Eric at that same regatta a year later when he was 13.

 He was always big for his age.


December 9th, 2010

Dad Being a JACKASS!

My old man seems to have fallen off the face of the earth!  I am starting to worry about him!  I guess he just doesn't have anything for me. Old age is catching up with the irrepressible Leo Costantino?  I can't believe it!




December 7th, 2010


So here is a little story for you so you can kind of understand why I turned out like I did.  As a kid we did a ton of sailboat racing.  In fact we did so much racing that the grass looked like a hay field by September, the piece of junk "Beauville" Chevy Van was always broken down because of neglect, and pretty much everything else had gone to hell so that the family could fully enjoy racing on the boat 7 days a week!

This Is a Beauville!  This is a nice one compared to ours!

  When I was 12 years old - mind you not a teenager - 12 years old we were at an important race in Tiverton, RI.  Suffice it to say that Dad and the rest of the crew had imbibed liberally of some cheap beer (Genesee Maybe?) at the end of the race day.  Turned out I was the only sober one in the bunch being a twelve year old.  Well the responsible adults all thought it would be a great idea to designate me - the 12 year old to be the van driver on the way home.  So they stacked me up on some cushions or something so I could see over the giant steering wheel on the Beauville and I proceeded to drive that hunk of junk over a couple of bridges and back to West Warwick.  Of course this was all fine because I had plenty of practice riding bicycles, mini-bikes, and go carts.  So when you wonder how I turned out a little nuts this might give you a little insight into why!  Your turn Dad! 


December 6th, 2010


Here is a new video of me depositing a bucket full of POO on my fathers front step.  This is precious!  









OK, I'm back.


Contrary to what you might think I have a life beyond sitting here telling the world what a meathead you are. As for the Beauville, the one you posted is way better than mine. Mine had a yellow door from a school bus if you remember correctly.

As for you driving home at 12 years old, that's true. But it's only because you were 12 because by the time you were 13 you were as drunk as the rest of the crew.

The picture is of Eric at age 13 at the same regatta a year later. He was always big for his age.

December 30, 2010

Papa Leo on "Meatheads"

OK, if you've been following this blog at all, and I don't know why anyone really would, you've heard me refer to Wacky Dad as "Meathead".  Some might think it disrespectful for a father to call his one and only child Meathead, but in the Costantino family that name is a term of endearment.

The youngest grandchild, Mia hasn't quite gotten into this but the older two daughters, Ailey and Abigail actually compete for Meathead status.

Wacky Dad has established levels of Meathead.  Yep, that's right, levels.

Here's a scenario:

Papa Mario, of "The Hearafter Video" fame is noted for enjoying strange foods that would make any normal person want to blow lunch.  At the table we've sampled such delicacies such as aligator, pigs feet, those disgusting little canned red frankfurters, anchovies and a host of other crap.

Well, the Costantino girls can raise themselves up a Meathead level by sampling one of Papa's delicacies.


Abigail is a little older and has wised up a bit and it's not likely she will fall into Wacky Dad's trap, but Ailey would eat anything to raise herself up a Meathead level.


It's unbelievable to watch this 7 year old gag on a pickled pigs foot just achieve Meathead level 9 or some other arbitrary level that Wacky Dad has set for the goal.  If the food item is extra disgusting Wacky Dad negotiates what level a tasting will achieve.  Eventually Ailey just can't resist the new found "Meathead status" and we all howl as she drops the disgusting morsel between her lips.


This is a very dysfunctional family.




December 12, 2010

This story doesn't have anything to do with my son Eric except that it does sound like something he would do.  It's too good a story not to share with everyone though.

Early this sailing season we were leaving one of my favorite gunkholes, the Kickimuit River.  There is a twisty windy channel you have to navigate to get out of there and on the right is a favorite local fishing spot.  Well, I look to my  right and there are two meatheads sitting on the trunk of their car fishing.  They  drove out to a high spot while the tide was out and never bothered to go back in before the tide came in.  So now they're a good hundred yards from any dry land, and there is a low spot between where they are and where they need to go.  There is a moon tide and when I saw them there was a good hour more of tide yet to come.

Well, with all the boats in the channel now watching them the meatheads decide that maybe they should make a try at getting back to shore.  So, quick as hell they jump in the car and make a run for it.

Now everyone on shore and in the gathering fleet of spectator boats is hootin' and hollerin', cheering these guys on.

Take a look at these pictures;

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But, the most amazing part of this story is that they actually made it to land. 

You just can't make this stuff up.

December 10, 2010

Ahh, but how many of you have ever seen a Doughnut Tree?  Not many of those around.

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December 10, 2010

Man am I relieved.  I got an email from a friend of mine this morning saying that Eric was on the front page of the Pro Jo.  I thought sure he must have been caught DUI with a load of poop in his back seat.

December 7th, 2010


Here's today's "episode" with this Whack-Job. I get a call around 8:00 AM this morning with the typical greeting, "Hey" Hey he says, I got a flat. Not a problem I'm thinking, he'll just put on the spare. But I should have known better, he rode around on the donut spare so long he wore it out, so of course he has no spare. OK I'm thinking, Yesterday at this time he was depositing a bucket of poop on my front step, and this morning he wants me to come save his ass with his flat tire. OK, I go get him way over in Cranston. We have to get a new tire mounted on the rim and then bring it back. But, he's not sure if the other front tire will even make it to the tire store where he bought a whole set. I follow him there and he makes it in. Let's see if he ever gets a spare. Not while I'm alive and he has a cell phone. I'm his spare everything! He said he owes me one and that he's sorry for the poop on my front steps.