The Musings Of A 10 Day Single Dad

Sorry for the week long absence.  I know you have all been going to pieces without your daily dose of Wacky Dad!  My wife has been in Germany for the past 9 days or so and is on her way home tomorrow.  I have been occupied filling the shoes of my wife and this has cut into my blog time.  This was the first time I have ever had my 3 daughters alone for more then 3-4 days.  I have to say that things went extremely smoothly, way more so than I thought they would.  I have a noticed a few phenomenon throughout the last 9 days that I thought I would run by my readers.

An oil and water moment!

1.  My 2 oldest daughters are notorious for fighting with each other.  I'm not talking about punching each other in the nose or anything bloody, but the typical sibling stuff.  They usually just get on each others nerves, like oil and water.  As soon as Mom left, these 2 kids haven't fought once.  In fact they have truly enjoyed each others company, the way that I would expect sisters to behave with each other.  I really wonder why that is?  Does missing mom make them appreciate each other more?  Do they think they can't get away with fighting with me (they can't)?  Or is it a coincidence?  I'm really not sure.  If anyone might be able to shed some light on this I would love to know what has caused this change is so I can make it lasting!  I am certainly not a psychologist but I am a good observer of facts.  I know I want to make this permanent!

2. I have noticed a change in myself over the past 9 days.  All of the stuff that usually drives me crazy but never gets done is all up to speed.  The laundry is 100% caught up on.  I have been doing one load a day which keeps the drawers full and the laundry bin empty.  Usually there is a massive damned pile of clothes that seems to get ignored by everyone in the house.

This ain't nothing!

As soon as laundry duty necessarily devolved upon me I
took the bull by the horns and it has gotten done in style.  The weird thing is that when my bride is around I totally hate doing the laundry, but this week is has been a source of true satisfaction for me to have it all squared away and in order.  The same thing happened with the kitchen.  When the kitchen is all cluttered up I get totally peeved.  As the week has gone on I have chipped away at the countertop clutter and can actually chop tomatoes and put a pot down next to the stove!  Oh the simple things!  I even have my kids neatly stowing away their clean laundry in its proper drawers and hiding places before school.  Little miracles.



I have a couple of hypotheses on why these strange housekeeping events have occured - here goes.

1.  The Tyrant Method - A smoothly running household needs one "tyrant" in charge of it, and the tyrant must have loyal and obedient underlings who know that they have to on a daily basis.  Cathy and I have always tended to try to share responsibility for the house.  I am not sure this is such a wise move.  It gives each of us an out when things become a mess.  It leaves room for comments like "why don't you ever do a load of laundry?" or "are you ever going to load the dishwasher?".  These past nine days I have been the dictator and things have gotten done without a lot of effort.  I haven't even had to pull the Marine Drill Instructor card to many times (I have used it a couple times though!).  Kids, unlike spouses know they basically have to do what dad says and they just fall in line automatically.

2.  The Non-Tyrant Method - If household duties are to be shared then I think a hard and fast plan is the only way to go.  Everyone needs to know what their jobs are and it needs to be strictly adhered to.  Everyone needs to be accountable for their duties, and when they fail at them, there needs to be an automatic punishment.  The punishment could be something like having to run twice around the house in your skivvy drawers at middday if you don't get your chores done, something on that order.  I'll bet if Cathy had to streak around the yard in her skivvies the damned laundry pile would stay small.  And I would certainly keep the kitchen sink cleaned if I had to do laps in my tighty whiteys.  This punishment would be mandatory and instantaneous.  Definitely food for thought.

Anyway I have missed my wife immensely over the past few days.  These observations aren't intended to poke fun at her or criticize.  I have the utmost respect for what she handles on a daily basis, you should have seen the schedule she left me before she left - pure beauty!  On the other hand when I notice positive change I would be a moron not to try to capitalize on it.  So Cathy welcome home, I have missed my best friend for the past 9 days!  But beware, you better trade in those holey underwear for something a little more slinky because I am going to have your ass lapping the house next time you forget to do the laundry!  My Flip camera is ready and the you tube account is ready and waiting!            


Laundry Pile Free And Smiling,

Wacky Dad